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Can I Help?
did I lose you?
Sofia Alonso Bauer
September 06, 2024
“In order to influence someone, you must already know what influences them.”
In order to significantly influence the people we lead, one of our primary goals is to understand the driving force behind their emotions, behaviors, and actions.
What stops us from moving forward, taking actions, or being our best?
Thinking “we’re not enough”
Thinking “we won’t be loved”
What shapes and controls the quality of our lives?
What shapes and controls the quality of our lives?
Your state (physiology)
Your focus (what are you focusing on)
Your vocabulary (what words you use and what meaning you give them)
Physiology | Focus | Language |
Breathing Hydration Movement Voice volume Voice tempo Diet Exercise | Global Belief Systems What is the purpose of life and death? What creates pain? Time: how much is a long time or a short time to you? (do you believe that time is scarce or abundant?) Where do you spend the majority of your time? (on the past reflecting, on the present moment, future thinking?) What are your beliefs about money, people, love, emotions, etc? | What vocabulary you use to label things. The questions you ask yourself. |
One of the most important outcomes of effective leadership is to help awake people to the unlimited potential that resides within them. The goal of understanding leadership is to recognize and understand the individual patterns of thinking and feeling that shape our decisions and actions so that you can help people change the source of these patterns long term.
“The individual leads in order that those who are led can develop their potential as human beings and thereby prosper.”
The highest level of achievement in life cannot be accomplished by any person working alone. People need one another. If you are to be a leader with a big vision, you won’t be able to achieve it without a team of leaders - an inner circle.
People need one another.
“The first method of estimating the intelligence of a ruler is to look at the men he has around him.”
Look at the people closest to you. What is their caliber? What can be said about their integrity?
Be willing to keep growing yourself.
Be willing to keep growing yourself.
Few things are worse than the teacher who is unteachable. As a leader, you will reproduce what you are.
If you remain unteachable, if your mind is closed, so will be the minds of the people you mentor.
It is impossible to help others intentionally grow if you are not intentionally growing. Just keep learning.
Learn to bring your full attention to the moments of your life. Start bringing more joy. Start bringing more confidence. Your life is the result of how consciously you strive to meet life’s harder challenges, grow beyond your comforts, and deliberatively work to overcome your biases and preferences so that you are able to love, serve, and lead others better.
Take responsibility for energizing others.
While it’s true that the people you develop need to be self-motivated, it’s also true that leaders create energy and inspire others to achieve.
Take responsibility for energizing others.
You are in charge of your enduring emotional experience. You can choose your feelings (the interpretations you have about the emotions you sense), and the more you do that the more you rewire how you experience emotions. You’re in charge of how you feel.
Choose to consciously cultivate joy.
“Human excellence is a state of mind.”
If you are always in a state of hurry, anxiety, stress, and busyness, then what energy are you teaching others to adopt and associate you with?
Stress lowers overall cognitive function.
If you won’t bring more mindfulness and joy into your life for the sheer personal improvement, then do it for those around you who might otherwise be harmed by unchecked emotional contagion.
Create a personal development process.
“The eye of the master will do more than both his hands.”
The ability to see, discern, and analyze is essential to developing people. Although growth begins inwardly, it must be proven outwardly. Therefore, the goals of growth must be something that can be seen and verified by you.
You have to have a vision for the future. You have to discern how the person will want to feel and what will be most meaningful for them.
Work through your insecurities.
Leaders who are afraid of looking bad or of being replaced rarely develop other leaders. You need to process through your issues so that you can work your way up to the higher levels of leadership.
You know that you can achieve a greater quality of life - do not allow your uncertainty over changing to cause you to self-sabotage.
Work through your insecurities.
Decide that people are worth the effort.
You shouldn’t think that people cause trouble and you want them to change. People are worth it. More importantly, you’re willing to take the trouble to help them.
Get fit now.
You need to exercise. A lot. Especially if you care about your mental performance.
You need to exercise. A lot. Especially if you care about your mental performance. Exercise increases production of brain - derived neurotropic factor (BDNF). This causes new neurons to grow in your hippocampus and other areas in the brain, creating increased plasticity and the ability to learn faster, remember more, and improve overall brain function. (What does this mean? exercise improves learning.)
Exercise enhances dopamine production and receptivity in the brain, which elevates your mood and mental performance.
Remember, energy is physical, emotional, and mental - and exercise improves each category.
“Only one who devotes himself to a cause with his whole strength and soul can be a true master. For this reason mastery demands all of a person.”